God Knows [Christina Vee],

"I will follow this through
Even though I'm crying
I'll even go through the worlds of darkness
I know who'll be going my way until the end.
And with you I'll [go to the] vast future...

There's nothing in this world,
That can bring my spirits down...

Both you and me, God Bless..."


"And that's what you get for falling again, you can never get him out of your head."

Two years ago, I would have listened to the song Pretty Girl by Sugar Cult, and though, "Omg. So totally GinXYunnie." Needless to say, I've changed a lot. But that's not what this is about.

I used to relate the song to a couple. A made up couple. It used to be a special song for me, and it still is. Because honestly, rping does make me feel like I'm the person I'm writing as sometimes, just like it does with my stories and collab. works.

And it's still special to me.

The only difference is that now I can relate to the song. Silly, isn't it? One year and you can relate to a song you didn't know the meaning to twelve months ago.

This year made me think of a lot of things I can relate to.
See, over this year...

I've locked myself in the bathrooms at school and cried.
I've slept for hours on end and then stayed up late thinking.
I've realized who I was, lost it, and, most recently, found it again.
I made up two years of absence and lack of Instant Messages with a week.
I've fallen in love.
I've been in denial.
I've been rejected by four someones in praticullar.
I've realized how I feel about everything.
I've taken a couple of steps towards happiness.
I've lived to the fullest.
I've seen the beauty in life.
I've improved my singing voice.
I've been told I'm stupid, retarded, and annoying.
I've been taken aback by the little things.
I've been completely ignored.
I've been in the spotlight.
I've considered "falling asleep forever" and never waking up.

Best thing of all? I lived to tell the tale.
Now I can stand up and say I've had every middle school expeiriance in fifth grade.
Everything makes sense now, and I love it.

I'm not saying it's not hard. I'm saying it's easier to pull through.


Sheltered Reality and Agricultural Days

Today was sooo much fun.

First we went to grandma's house, where the Ag. Day parade was already starting. Grandpa waved to us~ Also, candy was thrown at us in great handfuls, though we ended up having to divide it between my two cousins and I. Some of my besties were on the floats, which was nice because they gave us extra candy.

Then we went to Bosworth park, and, pardon me, but OH. MY. WORD.

Sheltered Reality, my new favorite music group, was playing! I was so shocked. I think I exploded. I usually look down on loud music, but this was so good I didn't mind. If you don't know, Sheltered Reality is a music group popular in Iowa, though they're branching out to other states. They have lovely music, all on the drums.

And you won't believe this. MY grandmother was picked by one of the children that was playing the drums, and she went up there and danced with them and they showed her how to play the drums! Imagine a seventy year old dancing! When she was done, she gave me the CD they gave her, "The First Decade". I was sooo happy. <3

McKenna and I got wristbands (they matched my outfit~) and played some games. We laser tagged each other, climbed in an inflatable jump-house, and turned cute little plastic duckies over in hopes of getting prizes. It was a bit of a repeat of last year, after we got past Sheltered Reality.

Before we left, Grandma bought us home-made ice-cream! It was delicious and melted in my mouth. Raspberry, yum!

Right now I'm taking it easy, listening to Everdream, and checking my e-mail.
What did YOU do today?


Noooo~! D;

I love rain. I really do. Rain is my friend. It makes puddles I jump in and dew that I capture in tight-squeezed cameras.

But right now, as I hear the patter of rain on the window, all I can do is groan and and be angry at the rainclouds for their stupidity; Didn't they know today I was meeting my teachers?

I don't want to get my new jumper dirty, the one I sewn esspecially for today. And my shoes, however old they are, shall be ruined if this rain doesn't lighten. Still, I suppose my new Mary Janes will be arriving in a few weeks, but I dare not come to meet my new teachers with muddy, wet, and dirty shoes.

I do hope Rai Rai will read this, and understand how terrible it is today in Iowa.


Princess's day at the bookstore.

The nice man at The Bookery helped me find some medical books.
I also picked out some childrens stories. >w<

Merck Manual of Medical Information.

(Pooh Bear books by A. A. Milne and Ernest H. Shepard)
Christopher Robin Leads an Expotition
Eeyore Has a Birthday
Pooh and Piglet go Hunting
Pooh Goes Visiting
Kanga and Baby Roo Come to the Forest

Dreams: Unlock the secrets of your subconscious - Frank Garfield & Rhonda Seward Garfield

The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame.

(Given to me from the Bookery owner, as to help me with my cancer research. Can you beleive this guy actually KNEW the author?)
Make me Laugh (A Cancer Survival Story) - Jeanine C. Marsters



Ice creams, mary janes, and sewing projects.

Our local grocery store has a great selection of ice creams. We could spend a near hour looking at all of them. Mother picked out, within three seconds, some Rocky Road icecream. She's so predictable sometimes. : )

I picked out a pretty-sounding one, ButterNut, after a few minutes. Sadly they had no green tea ice cream, my newfound favorite that Raquel had introduced me to. I can't wait to try them out. <3

Also, I'm saving up for some new Mary Janes similar (NOT fake-brand) to the ones that BABY sells. They're insanely adorable, and, since I've not enough money to buy a new Rori dress, I'll simply have to make my own. I think I shall stick to making my own Rori outfits, they can be so expensive and they never have the styles I want.

If anyone out there has a good pattern for a dress (in English?) please send it to me by e-mail. <3 Thank you.


Possible illness and peculiar dreams

The air was cold last night, or maybe it was just the room. I really don't know. I tried to cuddle up under countless sheet sand baby blankets, but my arms remained goosebumped and my face chilled. I wonder if I'm coming down with something.

Another thing is my recent dreams. As i drift into night, sometimes I have most peculiar dreams. For they are not like Alice in Wonderland, or like Pan's Labrinth, but instead my own world that flourishes with curiousity. It seems like frimilliar territory, my dreams, but when I wake up I caan not place my tounge on what had intriuged me in the first place, none the less. It's distant, but like I'm coppying a movie or book. Maybe Peach Pitt [the story I'm working on] has invaded my dreams.

I don't know. /Shrug.